Confucius was born in a chaotic era (much worse than today) when strong States in China went to wars with each other to compete for hegemonic power. I would expect almost nobody thinks about having inner peace because the thought of it is a luxury itself; much worse than today. Very few make attaining inner peace as a priority; obviously, they won’t attain it. Confucius correctly diagnosed the illness of the society that the root of the problem was people have become crazy; i.e. no inner peace and not thinking about attaining inner peace. People (especially the top 1%) refused to maintain societal order and harmony (礼坏乐崩). The ruling classes were competing to maximize personal power, wealth and sensual pleasures instead of the welfare of all the people; they sucked away all the air and made everybody else fight to breathe from the thin air which was disappearing. It couldn’t be solved with political or economic policies, although there were tons of political and economic problems. The root of the problems must be eradicated through education; an education to cure the mental illness of the people such that they value inner peace which is a more superior form of happiness than sensual pleasures. People can only attain inner peace if they put high priority to attain it. Confucius believed societal peace and harmony could be regained if he could persuade the people to self-regulate through a belief in rules and rituals 礼 (similar to belief in rule-of-law) and love for music 乐 (not just the privileged few but the whole society); let everybody be happy (众乐乐) instead of just the privileged few (独乐乐). He didn’t wait for somebody else to lead but took the liberty on himself to start the process of curing the society. He started recruiting students and educating people. Crazy people couldn’t recognize true reasons; therefore, Confucius’s ideas were strongly opposed by the ruling classes. They blamed the poor people for not being productive and couldn’t pay more taxes or rents to the government and the rich. Confucius was telling them to help the poor become more productive so that the economy will grow (aka make a bigger cake) and the rich will never become poorer. Unfortunately, the government and the rich were not interested; they only wanted to accumulate wealth as much as they could (aka take the biggest slice of the cake). Anyway, Confucius said: “Sweet grass herb grows in the forest but doesn’t stop releasing fragrant smell just because there was nobody around. A gentleman develops his spirituality but doesn’t change his moral conduct just because he is hungry for acceptance of others. He does whatever he can with good conduct in deed, word, and thought. Alive or death, success or failure, are to be left to fate or Dao (the Way reality is instead of one wishes it to be).” (且芝兰生于深林，不以无人而不芳；君子修道立德，不谓穷困而改节。为之者，人也；生死者，命也。) Be who you are and say what you feel. To deny our impulses is to deny the very thing that makes us human.
Confucius wanted to teach the people to love inner peace; because that is the only way to build world peace. How can one teach others to love inner peace if he doesn’t cultivate it within himself? Hence, the most basic teaching of Confucius is for one to practice inner peace himself first and foremost. Having no respect for the training and self-cultivation (修身) will only embarrass oneself when he tries to teach others. It is a matter of setting one’s priority correctly. If one’s priority is himself, his desires and sensual pleasures, surely these will occupy his mind instead of the search for inner peace. Inner peace is essential for one to make decisions correctly; a mind which is not calm will only make decisions which will bring harms to himself, his family, and even his community. Without inner peace, one who is angry or sad only hurts himself; this self-harm is unwise and reflects badly on one’s personality. Confucius taught his students to set their mind on learning the Dao (which is similar to Dhamma in Buddhism); which will make one a fine gentleman 君子 (which is similar to Arahant in Buddhism). He taught his students to be content to live with little and not to be greedy for wealth and position.
Confucius said: “After learning the true Dao in the morning, I have no more attachment to myself and am not afraid to die in the evening.” (子曰：朝闻道，夕死可矣。) This is true liberation. If one’s priority is inner peace, everything else is secondary and redundant. One is so unwise to cling on to himself, his desires and sensual pleasures but suffer the consequences. Confucius said: “A fine gentleman has three qualities, but I am yet to attain any of those. True compassion makes one has no worry, grief, hatred, or any unwholesome feelings; true intelligence makes one has no delusion and doubt; true courage makes one has no fear.” (子曰：君子道者三，我无能焉：仁者不忧，知者不惑，勇者不惧。) Confucius said: “Learned persons in the past generations learnt everything for their happiness and liberation; unlike learned persons of today who learn only “useful” knowledge for the sole purpose of working as servants who are useful to serve others.” (子曰：古之学者为己，今之学者为人).
Confucius said: “Being poor but not lickspittle, being rich but not proud, are not better than being poor but happy, and being rich but polite and respectful.” (子贡曰：贫而无谄，富而无骄，何如？子曰：可也，未若贫而乐，富而好礼者也。) The priority of a truly intelligent person is spirituality and inner wealth, not external or financial wealth. Confucius said: “Yan Hui, my favorite disciple, is supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! (He has perfect virtue, equanimity, and wisdom.) With little food and water, and living in a small house at the slum, most people would feel extremely depressed with poverty. However, Yan Hui is able to stay happy and never change his attitude towards being financially poor but spiritually rich.” (贤哉回也！一箪食，一瓢饮，在陋巷，人不堪其忧，回也不改其乐。) You can lose everything including your arms and legs but you must never lose your happiness.
Confucius said: “The only one who could maintain peace without the need to do anything was Emperor Shun. What did he have to do? He just upheld his ethics, expressed his great compassion and inspired all the people, and takes the leadership role of leading by example.” (《论语·卫灵公》子曰: “无为而治者，其舜也与？夫何为哉？恭己正南面而已矣。”) Confucius, like Lao Zi, agrees that the ideal situation is when there is no need to do anything. Of course, they meant doing the necessary towards achieving the state of nothing else to do (为无为 则无不治); no more problem, so no more intervention needed. The vision about the final goal is very important when you do something; so that you are truly clear about your mission and constantly stay on the path to reach the long-term goal. Playing clever tricks to tackle the symptoms but not eliminating the root cause will not have a good ending. While you are enjoying a peaceful life, albeit not perfect, don’t start to desire for perfection or “precious” things (in whatever ways you define them) and do all sorts of things to change the status quo. You may end up destroying peace and have to live in a chaotic world where you are forced to do more things to solve multiple problems created by earlier “solutions” which are actually non-solutions. Instead of being foolish and deluded, the best thing to do may just be to change the person in the mirror. One must not assume he has the responsibility or rights to change everything which he doesn’t like to see; one must learn to see reality as it is. The reality is perfectly imperfect.
Confucius said: “I wish to stop talking.” His disciple was alarmed and asked: “Master. If you stop talking, how could we learn from you?” Confucius replied: “What did Heaven ever say? The four seasons continue to rotate, and all living things continue to survive. What did Heaven ever say?” (《论语·阳货》子曰：“予欲无言。”子贡曰：“子如不言，则小子何述焉？”子曰：“天何言哉？四时行焉，百物生焉，天何言哉？”) A great leader just needs to lead by example and say nothing. The world will be peaceful if everybody learns from the ethical conduct of the leader, and everybody minds his own business. There is really nothing to say. Those who really know the Dao will not say what it is; those who say it do not really know what they are talking about (知者弗言, 言者弗知). The real Dao cannot be fully described with words; it can only be experienced, like Enlightenment. If it can be told, that only means it is not really a great thing. The Dao is in everything and everywhere. It is this at one time and space; it is that at another time and space (无常). When the leader is needed to speak, the world is already in chaos. What the leader says is not the Dao; he only speaks what is helpful at that moment and location. Why don’t you wish you never have to say a word? Why don’t you wish you don’t have to be a hero and let peace continue to thrive?
Confucius said: “Obtaining knowledge is not as good as loving the knowledge; loving the knowledge is not as good as feeling comfortable and happy to practice the knowledge and wisdoms (知之者不如好之者，好之者不如乐之者).” Knowing how to attain inner peace is different from practicing it; and this is yet different from the direct or personal knowledge of the blissfulness and happily abiding in inner peace.
Confucius said: “A gentleman would seek harmony and not insist on unity; despicable person would seek unity and not satisfied with harmony (君子和而不同，小人同而不和).” When we hear something which we want to hear, the words are pleasing to our ears (顺耳). When we are able to listen to different opinions, without disturbing our inner peace, our ears are pleasing to the words or people who want to offer ideas to us (耳顺). Dividing the opinions into right and wrong should be avoided. We should have a calm demeanor, peace of mind, and not easily swayed into emotional states when faced with points of view that run counter to us. We should recognize that there are different ways of looking at different things depending on the context and perspectives. Ultimately, we want to have the intelligent to do what our hearts tell us to do, without violating the Dao (能从心所欲，不逾矩).
Confucius said: “I have never seen a person who really likes compassion but hates people who lack compassion. A person who really likes compassion sees it as an extremely precious/rare thing and high standard which is very hard to achieve; therefore, not expecting many people to be able to achieve it. For a person who hates lack of compassion, his show of compassion is merely to prevent himself from being grouped among the people who lack compassion. Will he ever use all his energy to practice compassion?” (我未見好仁者，惡不仁者。好仁者，無以尚之；惡不仁者，其為仁矣，不使不仁者加乎其身。有能一日用其力於仁矣乎？) If compassion is easy for everyone to achieve, it will cease to be a precious thing. A fine gentleman who has true compassion will be gentle; his inner peace makes him have no anger nor grief.
Tolerance is the power to forgive (恕). One day, Confucius told his disciple, Zeng Shen: “Shen, my philosophies can all be related by one fundamental principle.” Zeng Shen replied: “Understood.” After Confucius left, the other disciples asked Zeng Shen: “What is the meaning?” Zeng Shen said: “The philosophies of our teacher can all be related to Honesty and Forgiveness.” (子曰： “参乎，吾道一以贯之。” 曾子曰： “唯。” 子出，门人问曰： “何谓也？” 曾子曰： “夫子之道，忠恕而已矣。”) Honesty (忠) means truly coming from the heart (忠于事，忠于言，忠于人，忠于己). Loyalty is an act of dishonesty if it doesn’t come from the heart; although some people like it that way regardless. When you are honest, to yourself and to others, everything you said comes from your heart. Nothing is artificial or pretentious, although you may not be right all the time. You will be honest to the king as much as being honest to the people. You will be honest in doing your job, and never make any promise that you don’t intend to keep. You will be honest to yourself, be who you are and not pretend to be someone you are not. If your heart is full of the capacity to forgive, you will be able to tolerate differences and not insist on conformance, although you like people to show good manners.
Most people love Confucius but at the same time dislike Confucians. Confucius has an image of being a compassionate and loving old teacher who tried very hard to bring world peace in the chaotic era of the Warring States period. He persevered to preach his belief in compassion and righteousness although he knew he would fail. Confucians on the other hand give people the impression of nasty old men who always put up an angry face like the fighting cock. Confucius advocated compassion and righteousness as the qualities for individuals to improve themselves. The incentive for individuals to attain the qualities is to have the desired inner beauty. The individuals can then be recruited by the king as government ministers. Confucians on the other hand view compassion and righteousness as precious things to possess, and they want everybody to believe that they have the qualities. To create that kind of illusion, they will let everybody know that they hate people who lack compassion and righteousness, as if they don’t have shortcomings in those qualities. In other words, they are bluffing. They further coerce everybody to show compassion and righteousness, hence the fighting cock look which upset everybody. They are intolerant of differences and diversity. They are big bullies, which is the opposite of the truly compassionate and loving old teacher that they try to emulate; so ironically. Confucius said: “Don’t worry about being misunderstood by other people; instead, worry about misunderstanding other people.” (不患人之不己知，患不知人也。)
Confucius said: “Intelligent individuals have a fondness for water, and compassionate individuals have a fondness for mountains. Intelligent individuals know how to adapt to changes (like water reshapes to its environment), and compassionate individuals like to keep quiet (like mountains). Intelligent individuals are happy, and compassionate people will have long lives.” (知者乐水，仁者乐山；知者动，仁者静；知者乐，仁者寿。) The great emphasis on inner peace is not overstated.
Inner peace can only be attained if one truly wants it. One must walk the path and not just stop at knowing the path. One must not give excuses to want many other things in addition to inner peace. Greed is toxic to one’s happiness. Hold on to what you have but don’t grip tightly. Let go of anything as and when necessary.
RESILIENT KID 